Zorro’s Zecurity has no applicants for guard duty despite the mission statement, so Zorro is asking Goldie the therapy dog, to help him with recruitment. “She will be my Human Resource consultant,” said Zorro.
Goldie’s first suggestion was to increase the starting salary with 50% and to give a sign on bonus of 5 tins of Toff’s select, bacon flavor. “But don’t tell your old employees about these incentives,” she said. “They will get upset.”
Zorro thought they should increase the salary for existing employees as well, but Goldie told him it’s not how it’s done. “They have already shown that they are willing to work for a lower salary, no need for an increase as long as they don’t know that new employees get more.”
As Zorro’s Zecurity does not have any current employees, it is academic anyway, so Zorro did not insist. Goldie went away to write the HR manual on fairness and ethics.
Angel Dog Diary 