Dear Dairy, another fun day with the Gardening Club. Today we focused on digging up the bones we planted a while ago. I got most of mine back, Uncle Zorro had a huge pile. He says I can have some of his, they are the biggest and juiciest. My bones are good, but a little dry. Aunt Loba says that next time, I should bury them deeper.
The Terriers got carried away as usual, they just kept on digging, long after all the bones were harvested. We had piles of dirt everywhere. After harvesting we had a dinner with Dr. Goldie who spoke on the topic of “Positive Gardening.”
Loba asked if she knew anything about gardening, she said not really, but she knew a lot about being positive because she is a Golden Retriever. Positivity is a concept that can be applied universally.
“Approach every task and creature with a positive attitude. Dig, dig, dig, how fun it is to be a positive gardener! Dig up the tulips, the roses, the dahlias and the peas, fun, fun, fun. Love all creatures, love your owners, love the mailman, love your fellow dogs, love the cats, the foxes and hamsters. Lick, lick, lick, give everyone a lick that you meet, hug, hug, hug. Now everyone turn to your right, lick who is next to you, then turn to your left, hug who is next to you, do it.”
Fortunately I had Loba to the right and Zorro to the left, so it was no problem for me, Zorro had to hug a Chihuahua, he was okay with that, but Loba had to lick a Bulldog, but she got through it. She whispered to me that the Bulldog was an overenthusiastic hugger.
“Positivity gives you advantages, people love you, they pet you, give you treats and tummy rubs, all day long. Just go up to a person and put your head in their lap and all good things will happen, guaranteed! If you snarl, you trigger bad vibes, you can get kicked and you will definitely be restrained. It is simple, Positive is Power.” Then she made us recite Positive Power 5 times in unison.
I think it is an interesting concept, but Loba said it was typically Golden Retriever talk, that it works for them and Labradors, but not so well for street dogs. Zorro whispered to me that the only true power is biting power.
Somebody asked how to deal with people frightened of dogs, but Dr. Goldie did not understand the question. A German Shepherd wondered if a working dog would not get the same advantages by working? Goldie said no, it is not what you do, humans do not understand results, it is how you are perceived. Then she asked for her payment in bacon, lots of it.
I am a little concerned about being positive toward cats, it did not work for me on Earth, but maybe it was an exception? I will consider being more positive in the future, I am trying to be a good dog.
Angel Dog Diary 